Sometimes I just feel like I want to disappear - down a hole, in a cave, under a blanket - whatever will hide me away from everyone. I feel so desperately alone. All of these people around me and I still feel as if there is a pane of glass between us....or maybe a pain of glass is more like it.
My mask is fooling them. I laugh, I smile, I pretend to work, but they do not know that I wish to not be a part of this world at this moment. The only things that save me are knowing my kitties need me, I did not work this hard in college to quit so soon, and I have not reached true happiness yet.
I would also miss her....
....that is what saves me and makes me get out of bed...i don't want to hurt her.
